By DR. PIERRE B. BLAND

“Please have a seat and the doctor will be with you momentarily,” the nurse stated as she escorted me into the exam room. I entered and did as instructed.

I looked around the room and noticed how much it resembled my exam room. Same brand otoscope/ophthalmoscope combination, exam gloves, even the sundry jars were similar. The rolling stool was different: mine being more comfortable since it is a saddle stool, the kind hair stylists use. To each is own.

Obviously in human medicine, momentarily means at least 15 minutes which was how long it took the doctor to appear. As she entered and introduced herself, she had a puzzled look on her face and stated, “Umm, you are sitting on my stool.” I suddenly realized I had gone onto autopilot and assumed my normal position in an exam room. As I proceeded to assume the non-doctor position in the room, I quipped “I usually help my patients onto the exam table.” I guess I was not in a position to exhibit my bed side manner. Despite the fact I was still feeling pretty bad a couple days after my pneumonia diagnosis, for some reason my attempt at humor was lost.

It was a Sunday and I was still spiking a fever and coughing a lot despite my initial treatment two days earlier, so I returned to the immediate care facility. This was a different physician than my initial visit and after reviewing my chart, she asked “What can I do for you today?” I held my tongue and thoughts of frustration despite being asked an unfortunate, if not stupid, question. Trying my best to be gracious, I requested she just help me feel better.

As she began her examination I notice she use the same brand and model stethoscope as I and also used a fountain pen to write her notes, also a shared trait. I thought she may be ok after all. Then she asked, “Are you Pierre Bland the veterinarian?” The question caught me by surprise,
but being the dynamic and confident professional I am I answered “Yes?”

“You don’t know this yet, but I am a client of your’s“ and the doctor proceeded to tell me about her pet deer and pot belly pig. I was referred to her by another client and she had also Googled me and thought she recognized me from an online photo. At this point the visit turned into more of a conversation than the usual inquisition medical exams can be. As the professional courtesies flowed, she opted to change and add some medications to my treatment and perform some blood work. When she told me the blood results would take a day or so to return, I kidded that at my clinic I can have the result in minutes or if I sent it out, in just a couple of hours. She chuckled as I gave her a business card and she wished me well.

As I departed, she called out, “…and I’ll remember not to sit on your stool when we come in.” “No worries.” I replied. “My exam room has two stools and a pew.”

Dr. Bland is a practitioner in Oakland Park, Florida. He can be reached at 954-673-8579.