The Associated Press

 

Before Baton Rouge police officer Montrell Jackson was one of three police officers killed in an ambush by Gavin Long on July 17, he had written a Facebook post expressing how difficult it was for him to be both a black man and a police officer.

The message was posted July 8, just three days after Alton Spencer, an African-American man, was shot and killed by police in Baton Rouge.

Here is the post:

“I’m tired physically and emotionally. Disappointed in some family, friends, and officers for some reckless comments but hey what’s in your heart is in your heart. I still love you all because hate takes too much energy but I definitely won’t be looking at you the same. Thank you to everyone that has reached out to me or my wife it was needed and much                           appreciated. I swear to God I love this city but I wonder if this city loves me. In uniform I get nasty hateful looks and out of uniform some consider me at threat. I’ve experienced so much in my short life and these last 3 days have tested me to the core. When people you know begin to question your integrity you realize they don’t really know you at all. Look at my actions they speak LOUD and CLEAR. Finally I personally want to send prayers out to everyone directly affected by this tragedy. These are trying times. Please don’t let hate infect your heart. This city MUST and WILL get better. I’m working in these streets so any protesters, officers, friends, family or whoever, if you see me and need a hug or want to say a prayer. I got you.”

The post, which has since been removed from Jackson’s page, ended with two emojis: a police officer and peace sign.